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pljotki-02Такое здарыцца магло хіба што толькі на Дзяды. У аднаго дзядзькі з нашай вёскі прозвішча – Доля. Ягоная жонка, Марыся, так яго і кліча. Калі на яго злуецца, то са змяіным акцэнтам гаворыць – Доля!, а калі ў добрым настроі, што дарэчы бывае адносна рэдка, тады лагодна – мая Доля.

Дык вось на гэтыя Дзяды, што цяперака во былі, Доля пайшоў па сваіх справах, а Марыся ў кароўнік даіць кароў. Ну цяпер ужо нават даярку даяркай не назавеш, бо раз, што не паліткарэкцерна, а два, што цяпер усё і ўсіх ужо доіць апарат дасланы з Брусэлю, а Марыся яго толькі каровам на цыцкі надзявае – такая, будзем казаць па-новаму – „малочніца-інжынeрыха”. Пайшла яна значыцца ў кароўнік на працу і не замкнула хату, бо ў нас па старой завядзёнцы дзверы ў хатах яшчэ не замыкаюць. У той час калі Марыся была на фэрме, у хату залез мясцовы Дон Жуан, гультай і прапойца, Мар’ян. Залезшы ў хату, пасоўгаўся туды-сюды па пакоях, парыўся ў лядоўні ў пошуку дабаўкі, і нічога не знайшоўшы, дапёр да першага на- патканага ложка, ды заваліўся спаць. Стомленая Марыся вярнулася са змены, пакалупалася яшчэ трохі на кухні, павошкалася ў сенях, зашчапіла нанач дзверы і не ўключаючы сьвятла ў спачывальні, каб не пабу- дзіць храпучага „мужа”, лягла побач.

Праз нейкі час Доля варочаецца дадому і пабачыў- шы, што дзверы зашчэпленыя, пачынае грукацца ў вакно. Перапалоханая Марыся зрываецца з ложка, бяжыць да акна і пытаецца:

– Хто там?
– Гэта я, Доля – адказвае муж.
– Які яшчэ Доля? Доля сьпіць дома, – нічога яшчэ не падазраючы пярэчыць Марыся.
– Якое спіць? Доля ж тут, я ж твой Доля, – жартуе муж, таксама яшчэ ні пра што не здагадваючыся.
– Які мой Доля? Мой Доля ў ложку ляжыць…

І вось вяртаюся я, значыцца, з могілак, а на даро- зе чыста Міцкевічаўская, так бы мовіць, сцэна. Доля з віламі гоніцца за Марыянам, Марыся лямантуючы на ўсё горла бяжыцьугаворвае Долю супакоіцца, а Марыян быццам тая здань, з III часткі „Дзядоў”, збялеўшы як палатно дае драпака і не разумее нават тол- кам у чым правініўся. Такая сітуацыя, самі разумееце, што і вініць няма каго. Ну, хіба што ўстарэлую вясковую традыцыю – не замыкаць дзьвярэй, або новую дурацкую звычку замяняць Дзяды на Халуін…

Гэля з Грэдэляў

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